One of the benefits of adulthood is we can envision goals and then act appropriately toward meeting our goals. Seemingly, it all boils down to our choice of acting or not. I recall several years ago attending a conference for my job. While planning, my wife and I decided that it would be the perfect time to pack up the family and make a mini vacation out of the trip, so the girls and Leona came along. Following my conference responsibilities, we suited the girls up and enjoyed some relaxation while the little ones ventured into the swimming pool at the hotel. While watching the girls play and learn to swim my wife and I discussed the benefits of having a swimming pool at our home. Long story short, the universe aligned and rather than constructing a pool at the house we were blessed to purchase a small family motel, yes, even equipped with a swimming pool.
As summer bore down upon us the girls spent many of their afternoons and evenings in the pool, splashing around, doing their best to become proficient in the art of swimming. It was apparent that during these swimming adventures our eldest daughter, Lilli, was determined to show her little sister the ropes as well as ensuring that all rules and safety protocols were strictly adhered to. It was during one of these adventures that Lilli experienced the first dent in her “older sister” armor.
Anyone that has had the pleasure of meeting Lilli understands that she is an extremely driven child. Her desire to help others, including her sister, has at times become overwhelming for the young child but she refuses to give up and consistently attempts to exert her elder knowledge and abilities. With only fourteen months separating her from her sister Riyann, Lilli is truly committed to be a mentor to the younger sibling even in the times of routine sisterly battling. One aspect of youth which Lilli has struggled with is understanding that even though she is older than her sister, there are times Riyann will exceed her. Whether it was losing a tooth first, or running faster, or coloring a better picture Lilli simply cannot accept if her sister achieves something before, she does.
Lilli’s extremely competitive nature was brought to the forefront a couple years ago as the girls mother worked with both of them as they learned the art of diving into the pool. Not wanting to interject, I decided to sit along the pool side and watch as the trio interacted and the girls, filled with giggling and laughter, did their best to dive into the swimming pool, head first. After very little prompting, Riyann performed the perfect forward dive into the pool. Following a great deal of excitement and congratulatory words, Riyann beamed with pride as she continued to dive in the pool repeatedly, even giving her sister advice on diving, which didn’t go over well as you could imagine. Lilli on the other hand was having no part of it. The look of pure disdain filled her face as she tried and tried again to dive as her mother instructed. Being unsuccessful, Lilli’s frustration increased with each perfect dive performed by her sister until the time she simply stated she was tired and was going to get out of the pool. Understanding the true reason for her departure we tried to encourage her to not give up, but she had, had enough for the day.
Later that evening our family gathered in the living room preparing to watch a movie. As we engaged in small talk, I noticed Lilli was nowhere to be found. I walked upstairs where I found Lilli seated on her bed watching her iPad. I inquired as to what she was doing when she replied she was just studying. As we spoke I learned that Lilli, upon returning from the pool, immediately began watching videos on her iPad which showed the process of diving into a swimming pool. Smiling, I had no choice but to allow her to continue along her journey of recovering her pride through a resurgence of her dominance over her little sister by not only learning to dive but by diving better. Lilli continued studying video’s the entire evening, refusing to admit defeat.
Lilli’s commitment to exceed her sisters’ abilities, although cute on the surface, has become a rallying point for the elder sibling. As with this instance, Lilli has learned that if she struggles with something she need only put her time in to find success. Her commitment to research, study, and practice has thus far allowed her to not only ultimately conquer her defeats but likewise excel in life. As I think about my child, I am reminded about just how often we stumble throughout life. Maybe it’s at work, accomplishing tasks, or at home. Failure is at times unavoidable but if we are committed to success, if we put in our time to study and learn from our mistakes, we will surely succeed and before long be diving into the deep end. Lilli successfully learned to dive the next day and again began enjoying her time at the pool. Rather than succumbing to her inability, she overcame and showed that a commitment to excellence will in the end overshadow any failure. We can all learn a lesson from her perseverance, for it is through hard work, preparation, and commitment that excellence is realized.
